When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
