I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
