Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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