He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
