I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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