I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
