i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
