fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
