Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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