Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
