i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
