did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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