Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
