Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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