I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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