I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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