Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
