Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Randomize
