I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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