But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
