He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Randomize
