Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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