Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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