You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
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