ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Randomize