let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
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