using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Randomize
