Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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