I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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