So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
