did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I just found a bag of teeth...
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
