Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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