Im at strip club and am horny
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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