im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
