dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
