How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
