i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Randomize
