are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
You've changed since you got that strap on
Randomize
