He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize