I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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