we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
They have beer where we have blood.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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