I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
You can't special order awesome
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Couch. On fire.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
