Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
ttyl tear gas
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
