yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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