He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
