honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
