So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize