She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
