I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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