Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize