low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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